If your teen makes a poor choice at school, the school might contact you to discuss the consequences. If your teen makes a poor choice at school Find out more about why teens make bad choices and how you can help your teen learn from their poor choices. It’s important your teen sees you dealing with this situation so they understand that protecting their safety and the safety of others is essential. In this situation, keeping your teen close and letting them know you are there to help them really matters. Keep calm, ask questions to assess the safety risk, and then get the help you need, without judging or blaming your teen. If you believe your teen is at risk, or your teen mentions there is a threat to their safety or someone else’s, it is important you deal with this immediately. They also learn how to adapt and problem solve as they deal with situations they may not have been expecting. When teens make poor choices, they learn how to handle negative emotions which is an important coping skill for life. It can be quite powerful to let your teen know that everyone makes mistakes, including you, and talk to them about how you handle such situations so you can learn from them. When a teen recognises their share in the outcome of a personal choice, they are more likely to accept some responsibility and consider the consequences of their choices more carefully next time. Teens can learn about responsibility when they make a mistake. Dealing with mistakes can teach your teen many valuable life skills. But there will be times – provided your teen is not putting themselves or others in danger – when it’s best to let them handle a situation their way. Sometimes it’s hard to let your teen make a mistake. Every time you acknowledge your teen’s good choices, you are encouraging a positive mindset and giving them a taste of success which will motivate them to keep going. Remember to celebrate the little wins along the way because helping your teen to make good choices could take time. When you notice them making a good choice, reinforce to them that they are on the right path while encouraging their independence: “I can see that you really thought that through, and you seem happy with the outcome” will have more impact than “Great job! You’ve made me happy”. You can encourage your teen to make good choices through the comments you make. Routines bring structure and predictability to a teenager’s world which can help them manage their emotions and make better choices. Use routines to support your teen in making positive choices. And be willing to review the rules as your teen shows responsibility and grows older. Agree in advance what the consequence will be if your teen doesn’t stick to the agreed rules. When your teen is part of the process, they are more likely to stick to the rules. Establish rules and routinesĪgreeing what you expect from your teen can encourage them to make good choices. These kinds of milestones will require your teen to make a big decision, so keep track of what’s going on for them so you can guide them through it. For example, they might have to select their subjects for the new school year, design their SET plan, work out what path they want to take when they finish school, or make a decision about a social event their friends are organising. Be aware of your teen’s big eventsīe aware of the important events or milestones coming up in your teen’s life and try and connect with them so you can talk together about what’s on their mind and help them make good choices. Guide your teen through these five steps to help them make good decisions. Explain to them why tackling a problem when they are calm and can use their thinking skills, not just their emotion, can help them make good choices. Talk to your teen about the role emotions play when making choices and how the part of their brain that controls decision-making is still developing. When teens feel excited, anxious or upset, they can struggle to make good choices. Research shows that having open, honest conversations with your child, early and often, is one of the most effective tools you can use to help your teen make good choices. Talk to them about how to deal with difficult situations such as underage drinking, other drug use, bullying, violence, and suicide. Stay connected so when your teen needs to talk, you can guide them in making good choices. Here are six things you can do to help your teens make good choices during this complicated time in their lives. So a teen’s developing brain places them at greater risk of making poor decisions and being less able to consider the consequences of their choices. Yet, the parts of the brain that control decision-making don’t fully develop until early adulthood. During the teenage years, young people have to make many decisions about school, their friends, and their future.
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